@chrisrockoz: You only live once, so don't forget to spend 15 hours every day on the internet, desperately searching for the validation of strangers.
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@1followernodad: Me: I'm a scorpion. Date: You mean scorpio? Me: (clicking my claws together) No I very do not.
@Ristolable: For sale: car. Does not stop. You will have to jump in as I jump out. I have been driving this car for three years. Please help me
@UnFitz: [rescued at sea] Coastguard: Where are the others? Me: Had to eat them. CG: You were out there for 4 hours. M: They really got on my nerves.