@hipstermermaid: You raised me and taught me everything I know. Happy Father's Day, internet.
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@Australianimal: Taken 4: Liam Neeson's daughter is kidnapped again. He calls up kidnappers and says "just keep her. She's annoying and I'm tired of this"
@envydatropic: First date - I'll have an ice water and a lettuce wedge Tenth date - I'll have a large pizza, extra cheese. What do you want, honey?