@juliussharpe: You ran a half-marathon? Wow! Half congratulations!
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@AmishPornStar1: I don't know why I would want to "Keep Up" with them... I don't even know where Kardashia is. (geography's not my strong suit)
@ElgatoEsmio: SOME DUDE IN A LAB IS WORKING ON BRINGING THE PTERODACTYL BACK TO LIFE SO ENJOY THOSE EVENING STROLLS WHILE YOU CAN!
@WilliamAder: Doctor: Have you quit smoking yet? Me: Has there been a string of unsolved murders in the news? Doctor: No. Me: Then, no, I haven't.
@duckpuppet: In these tough times, you can pop in the Titanic DVD to watch rich people die painfully, their money powerless against the fury of nature