@Norsebysw: "You run like you're making fun of running." -my brother
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@HatfieldAnne: Him: Watch your language at dinner tonight. Me: So you want less Tarantino... H: ...and more Seuss. M: Gotcha. No swearing. Lots of rhyming.
@imdaintyaf: People complain when my baby is crying and then they complain when I stuff her in the overhead bin, MAKE UP YOUR GD MINDS
@JayUhOh: Five chickens leave Topeka traveling west at 25 mph. Please help me find them chickens. Those are my chickens.
@Birdhumms: A selfie stick is very useful..... .. as a prod to keep people out of your personal space.