@buseysteeth: You think you have problems, I used a toothpick to get a toothpick out of my teeth this morning.
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@marinhubka: "I'm not sure-" wife: honey he's a zookeeper if he says these are koalas I trust him-aww look at them! *the raccoons hiss from the dumpster*
@zacharyflynn: If I knew how to pull a rabbit out of a hat I would never stop. Rabbits are great.
@juliussharpe: For just $28,000, I will teach any politician or politician's wife to wave like a normal human being.