@Molly_Kats: YOU TWEETED 23 TIMES TODAY. RT @realDonaldTrump People ask me what I do in my free time. The answer--I don't have any.
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@WarrenHolstein: Could you imagine being the Secret Service agent that blocked a bullet for Donald Trump, 20 years later? You wouldn't tell anyone.
@DanTaylorAuthor: Me: *gets in from fishing trip* Girlfriend: did you catch anything? Me: *sighs* just an old boot Girlfriend: okay, what's she called?
@joshesjames: Tomorrow is Jesus' birthday. I got him an Xbox. Keeping it at my house until I see him.
@theyearofelan: Instagram is down! I'm freaking out! What are you people eating? How are your pets? What the hell is happening???