@ilovepie84: You would be surprised at how many people will run if you yell "ITS A TRAP" and run in a random direction
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@HatfieldAnne: Me: I weigh 10x more than the cat and yet she trusts me completely. So sweet. You: Me: You: It’s a lot more than 10x. Me: Don’t ruin this.
@jordan_stratton: My parents never allowed violent video games. Just family-friendly board games with questions like, "Who murdered this guy with a pipe?"
@RidiculousSheri: Love means never having to say you're sorry for accidentally bringing home six more cats.
@novixv: [Plane starts to go down] *Frantically shoves an entire bag of Life Savers Gummies™ into my mouth*