@sixfootcandy: You'd think my hair would be a little more cooperative considering how many times I blow it per week.
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@Chyld: I want to open a pizza shop called "Cheesus Crust!" Our slogan will be: "Heavenly ingredients, served hot as Hell." -or- "Crust has risen."
@Dutch_50: I'm at a point in my life where I admire the majestic full trees in my yard and marvel at the amount of leaves I'll need to rake.
@rickolantern: When my goldfish starts acting like a jerk I remind him that his bowl is microwave-safe
@thatdutchperson: "No points, illegal kick to the face." "But I'm the hero of this movie." "Fair enough, here's your trophy." -The Karate Kid