@chrisviccaro: You'd think old people would drive faster with the whole death thing creeping up on them and all.
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@jenlaw_11: Birds are dinosaurs? No. I want dinosaurs here or I want them completely gone. I don't need a bullshit imitation dinosaur to shit on my car.
@AthenaMystique: Dear Google Maps, Don't insult me by telling me to head "southwest". If I knew where southwest was, I wouldn't be using you. Kthnxbye
@ParentNormal: I can't tell if my baby is a slow clapper or is starting a slow clap to mock my parenting.