@chrisviccaro: You'd think old people would drive faster with the whole death thing creeping up on them and all.
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@mattZillaaaa: My credit card company sent me a final notice bill. Good, I was tired of hearing from them
@DothTheDoth: No one wants to talk about Dracula's defining quality, turning into thousands of bats to avoid human contact.
@ashleyaustrew: I want to know what love is. I want you to show me. No, not you. You. On the left. Other left. No. Jesus Christ, I'll do it myself.
@BumbleDC: If a malevolent demon is watching you sleep, simply go to Settings > General > Privacy > Malevolent Demon Who Watches You Sleep (Deactivate)