@timdonakowski: Your baby's cute. Not baby elephant cute, but still cute.
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@Rainbowbunee: Pretty woman, the kind that don't eat meat Pretty woman, the kind that likes to hug trees Ohoh what can I do? She's making me eat vegan food
@rolldiggity: New Parent Idea: 1. Take pictures of you pulling baby out of spacecraft in forest. 2. Hide pictures in attic for kid to find when he's 10.
@andylassner: "I haven't accomplished much but I will harshly judge the hard work of others" -Critics
@Dallani: One time, I broke my iPhone and for 2 days I had to tweet from my Macbook like a God-dammed homeless person I don't like to talk about it