@Parentpains: Your blood pressure looks normal, I'll fix that. - Children, every five minutes.
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@SarcasticAlly12: People say "life's a journey, not a destination," because the destination is death. The journey sucks too. Anyway, to the bride and groom!
@GingerGander: A new study says vegetarians die younger than smokers, on average, so don't smoke your vegetables...