@MikeRevenaugh: Your boss will respect you more if you sometimes disagree, especially if you touch their face and say "You silly goose."
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@MatCro: "Pete's coming for dinner tonight." "Pete from work or Pete who thinks he can walk through doors?" [Massive thud] "I'll just check."
@kathybotteas: If the emoji I wanna text is not in the "recently used," you may have to wait 3 days till I find it.
@trevso_electric: Thanks to ChristianMingle, I met the woman I will put through a terrifying emotional rollercoaster before I finally come out of the closet.
@jwoodham: DATING TIP: Don't reply to texts right away or you might look desperate. Just wait. Give it 5, 10, maybe even 15 years. Keep things casual.