@charliedelta7: Your face. There's a bat for that.
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@pleatedjeans: [job interview for garbageman] interviewer: I like your enthusiasm, you're hired Three raccoons in trench coat: [ecstatic chittering]
@carlyken: Give it to me straight "I'd really like to have sex with you-" Now give it to me gay "-r boyfriend."
@therealeatwood: KING ARTHUR: …and that is our noble quest. REPORTER: K, great. What shape is your table? A: Um, round? But that’s not really… R: Got it
@GrantTanaka: "I was thinking of all the shit I hate, so I made a list of all the shit I hate" *notices you don't care *adds you to list of shit I hate