@MariyaAlexander: Your Harvard education doesn't make me respect you more - it makes me respect Harvard less.
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@_Water_Baby: When you are having a new mattress installed, remember to hide your "toys" BEFORE the movers arrive.
@dumbbeezie: My doctor is always whispering to me something about not sticking Q tips in my ears. I need a louder doctor
@YayatiSB: My wife said: Pls go to shop & buy a carton of Milk & if they have eggs, get six. I came back with Six cartons of Milk & told they had eggs.