@DurtMcHurtt: Your helium addiction is out of control, but nobody is taking your cry for help seriously.
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@daemonic3: [1st date] HER: So do you have any hobbies? SALT SHAKER: Nice dress! It would look great on my floor HER: What?! HIM: Just ventriloquism
@bobbiejo448: I don't want to tell you how to run your company, Hostess, but liquidating just as weed becomes legal seems like a bad business decision.
@bobvulfov: Professor i'd like an extension on my paper. why? well my ex just got married & i have to comment "lame" on all her wedding pics on facebook