@shariv67: "Your honor, my client is absolutely not a flight risk."n"What makes you so sure?"n"He is a penguin."
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@pinupteacher: [speed dating] Anyway, do you have a baby hedgehog? "No." *I take a deep breath and roll my eyes* [timer beeps]
@Reel2Dialog2: Pizza: You should totally eat all of me. Like, all by yourself. Me: What? No way. Pizza: Why not? Me: That's a really good point.
@ValeeGrrl: My son wants to play the cello next year and his reason is "cuz I'd get to sit down a lot" and I've never felt more related to him.