@lawyerthoughts: Your honor? My client would like to address the court and ruin everything.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheMichaelRock: Today my boss will learn that I am nowhere near mature enough to be left alone with a label maker.
@Bob_Heller: Sorry I borrowed your pen and performed that emergency tracheotomy that turned out not to be an emergency. And sorry about your neck hole.
@caseytduncan: Genie: You have 3 wishes. I don't want to run into spiderwebs anymore. That's it.... I'm done. You can keep the other 2 wishes.
@_NinJar: *cop frisking me* Cop: "theres nothin in your pockets that will poke me, right?" Uh, no Cop: "OW!" *baby porcupine jumps out* RUN POKEY, RUN