@Darlainky: Your Honor, these 52 selfies on my clients phone at the precise moment of the crime prove that my client can only be guilty of narcissism.
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@thefurlinator: "I'll see you in hell" should be followed with "and I won't even stop to say hi". Otherwise you're just making plans with someone you hate
@_CherriAnn_: My walk of shame is going back for a shopping cart after realizing I can't carry 23 items in my arms through the store.