@Darlainky: Your Honor, these 52 selfies on my clients phone at the precise moment of the crime prove that my client can only be guilty of narcissism.
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@Tommassh: *looks through telescope* *telescope thinks you're looking at him and waves* *you wave at Jupiter behind* *telescope awkwardly lowers hand*
@KrissiBex: I love kids...But stop making me hold your baby. Why are you letting people touch your new born?!? I don't let people touch my new iPhone