@ChristianPlante: Your perfume/cologne should reward someone for getting close, not punish them for being in the same building.
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@1Happytwit: Shouting "Shotgun" will get you the front seat of a car or a heap of cash if you whisper it to a cashier.
@batkaren: What if life on Earth is just a video game for gods, and my guy has the crappy controller?
@Miciura: Honesty is the best policy, unless you're trying to return something that you've already worn.
@Tmoney68: A man played Justin Bieber to force an attacking bear to run off. He was treated for his injuries, then arrested for cruelty to animals.