@jonni_howard: "Your storage is full" thanks Apple, I'll just go and delete some photos of friends and family, but at least I'll always have the stocks app
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@drxubair: I'd love to change the world. But I don't think there is a diaper big enough to hold all the shit.
@AaronFullerton: "You deleted your search history. Good move. But you forgot about something..." *cop gets all up in suspect's face* "Targeted. Banner. Ads."
@Sickayduh: I thought I saw Bradley Cooper but it was just every poem ever written formed into a beach sunset with amazing hair