@DandyTruman: Your tweets are so boring the NSA just unfollowed you.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@LaceyNycole: 2-year-old: *points to my belly* Baby! Me: Yep, there's a baby in there! Will you love it? 2: I eat it. Well that escalated quickly.
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: Dad has his phone in a protective case that could survive a lunar landing but growing up I don't remember us kids ever wearing a seat belt.