@birbigs: "You're joking about calling it Good Friday, right? I told you the part about the nails?" -Jesus #GoodFriday
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@Playing_Dad: Daughter: Daddy, why do you have to go to work everyday? Me: Do you like clothes? Daughter: Not really Me: Shut up
@lovemydogduck: Getting shit done. Was my response when my boss ask me what I'm doing. And now I'm sitting outside of H.R.
@fro_vo: [airplane intercom] good afternoon ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking why did you leave without me