@birbigs: "You're joking about calling it Good Friday, right? I told you the part about the nails?" -Jesus #GoodFriday
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@noog: Jesus: I have to die because of sin God: Yes Jesus: Which you created as punishment God: Yes Jesus: For eating an apple God: Yes Jesus: No
@iamledgin: Hey, guy in Prius blasting heavy metal - decide which type of annoying person you want to be.
@XGroverX: I don't know why smokey the bear carries a shovel, but it scares the shit out of me.
@SamReidSays: Netflix, stop making me wait 15 seconds between episodes. I can't click because I'm eating cereal and a sandwich.