@SamGrittner: You're one day closer to death AND you get free cake? What’s not to like about birthdays?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@WheelTod: I don't sweat Friday13. I'm not superstitious. I just take off to a nice quiet cabin in the woods, slaughter a pack of teenagers, then chill
@BradBroaddus: My wife completely ignores me when she watches Grey's Anatomy......so I ordered the first 5 seasons.
@junejuly12: Seeing a woman drinking, smoking, and gambling while in her wedding dress makes me realize I need to up my multi-tasking game.