@SSDated: You're only as awkward as you say you are...out loud...in front of people...who were in a private conversation...that didn't involve you.
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@JessObsess: [drunk text] God I miss you so much. Why can't we go back to how things were? OBAMA: How did you get this number?
@jctwritesstuff: I mean, if Marie Antoinette didn't want her head cut off, maybe there should've been actual cake. ~ Why I was kicked off the debate team
@rhysjamesy: I go trick or treating dressed as a postman early in the morning and do the postman's exact route one house ahead so no one trusts him.
@DirtMcTurd: I don't need pepper spray to stop a mugger, I just open my wallet and blow the dust in their eyes.