@skullcat: You're so empty inside....nnn....stupid fridge.
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@meatlobes: *im applying Chapstick and doing curtseys in the mirror* *dad walks past* *dad double takes* *im doing push-ups and drinkin a protein snake*
@Sickayduh: Son: Sire, I wish to change my name King: Why, Prince Stephen? Son: Because you call me "Prince S" King: Haha yeah that never gets old
@lamefactory: 911, what's your emergency? What do you mean you've been stabbed? People can't do that, that's illegal.
@VenisVal: My friend's wife is so controlling. When they're together, he talks like he's filming a hostage video.