@sip_at_home_mom: 2016 took so many beautiful, talented men I've loved my entire life. Seems unfair that I still have to dodge my ex at the grocery store.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheHyyyype: HER: my friend katie is single again ME: so's my buddy dave, we should set them up HER: yes! [later] DAVE AND KATIE [talking to the cops]: we swear we were framed!
@Darlainky: My husband cooked dinner for my daughter and me, or as he so eloquently put it, “Makin’ dishes for my bishes.”
@NeinQuarterly: The #NSA walks into a bar. Bartender: "Got a new joke for you." NSA: "Heard it."