Rare image of an elk stepping on a Lego.
Deciding which personality is going to respond to an email
if there is a particular food you would like your children to eat less, just go buy a massive box of it at Costco
funny guys are dangerous they make you laugh and laugh then boom they hit you with a shovel and throw you in a ditch
long distance relationships can work if the 4 of you all truly trust each other.
As per my last nervous breakdown
{during sex}
him: i’m sorry, did you just say “faster, papa smurf”
Who called it beef chow mein and not moodles?
“Church is like prison for me: they can’t keep me out.”
– Midnight, a church friend
that’s not arthritis. It’s early onset rigamortus.