A customer just told me that it takes a 14 mile run to work off 1 Oreo. Don’t worry she’s dead now

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Your move Martha Stewart


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Techno is like running on treadmill I think it’s been an hour but it was only 3 minutes


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Superman: Cool underwater lair. Can I use the bathroom?

Aquaman: The what?


If all the good ones are taken and you are single, what does that make you?


The guy who invented folding chairs lovingly cares for his product which is a problem for his wife who has season tickets to pro wrestling