@10InchesPlus

A model train set is the male equivalent of 25 cats.

You Might Also Like

@Mom_Overboard

[having a discussion]

BF: don’t make me keep talking I will only make it worse

@TheAndrewNadeau

Made a relationship pact with my best friend: If neither of us is married by the time we’re 40, we honestly tell each other what traits make us unlovable.

@Birdhumms

Brain: If we leave now we’ll be on time for once.

Body: Ten more minutes then.

@neiltyson

Because you know I’m all about that data, ‘bout that data. No trouble. I’m all about that data, ‘bout that data. No trouble.

@AndrewChamings

Dinosaurs prolly have ghosts too, what if there’s a diplodocus just standing where your house is right now, bored as shit

@TheHyyyype

[first date]

HER: i’m really into guys-

ME (eager to impress her): me too

@lnbshr

When Squidward lost his job and had to stay with Spongebob and he tried to tell Spongebob the TV didn’t work n Spongebob said THAT’S TWO THINGS THAT DON’T WORK 😭😭😭😭

@DothTheDoth

Two squirrels in the backyard. But they are not playing together. Wonder if there’s history.

@ln0217

Gonna put watermelon on my pizza just to start a Twitter uproar