@leechee420: Accidentally ate the sticker on my apple. This wouldn't have happened if it had been a Snickers.
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@IchBin_Rob: GPS: Take the next right. Me: GPS: Make a U-Turn. GPS: Make a U-Turn. Me: [Going 70mph down a hill in a Target shopping cart] I don't know how to tell you this...
@mantej: Haters gonna hate. Tweeters gonna tweet. It’s actually pretty obvious that verbs are performed by their respective nouns.
@PetrickSara: Husband:What do you want for Mother's Day? Me:I don't want to have to tell you what I want Husband:(goes to the store and never comes back)