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@FeelingEuphoric: [alien parasite invasion]
ME: Welcome to earth, I'll be your host
@slimmy_shady: Hey I worked for it too!
@DanTaylorAuthor: I dropped my bowl of SpaghettiOs and it spelled 'oooooooo' on the floor. Spooky
@MoneypennyNaked: Everyone is drunk except me.
- a horror story
@LeBearGirdle: Doctor: I'm sorry son, it appears you have... Jenga-itis
Me: [trying to pull the doctor's shoes off without him falling over] is it bad?
@AndyAsAdjective: The new employee manual at work mislabeled "casual Friday" as "cannibal Friday" & sadly we lost poor Dorothy before anyone could stop Fred.