@Shade510: Alright...who left me unsupervised again?
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@Slim_is_Fat: (Watching Liar Liar) Wife: If you couldn't lie for 24 hrs, how much longer would we be married? Me: Until the end of this movie.
@LittleMissAngr1: Him: *recites romantic speech he wrote about his undying love for me* Priest: And the bride? Me: *realising my vows weren't supposed to be a list of the shit I won't put up with* um, pass.
@bonehugsnirony: hi welcome to my podcast “consciousness was a mistake” today we’re gonna take a nap together to demonstrate that being aware of reality is bad