@RandomRamblr: An accountant who disappears with all his client's money is a math magician.
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@WheelTod: I always carry a pocket knife, because I never know when I'll need to slice open a pocket.
@AnnietheNanny1: The seven year old I work for just informed me my haircut makes my hips look wider, so I have that going for me.
@Mr_Kapowski: I like to ask people what their sign is and then read them a completely different sign's horoscope just to hear them say "that's so me!"