Someone I don’t know sent me a message that was just 3 question marks, and I replied, “Same.”
An interrogator that just goes into the room and loudly eats a peach until the suspect confesses to everything.
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The only real certainties are death, taxes, & people who haven’t seen each other in forever, blocking whatever you need in the store.
A great tip. #CakeRex
Had a 6″ sammich from subway today, and it totally didn’t fill me up. I get it now ladies, and I’m so, so sorry.
I bet Yoda was pretty hot before he turned into an old Asian lady.
I have lumps on my head.
I’m 35 and have never been divorced!!!
I’ve never been married either but at this age you have to focus on the good parts.
Goodnight moon, goodnight stars. Goodnight weird guy who walks past my house on crutches every night. Goodnight house on crutches.
I started running today. Also, there is a new mean dog in the neighborhood that interrupted my walk today.
Me: I love the 90s!
Grandparents: we have names