@LostFelicia

And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like – Never just be yourself. There’s something wrong with you.

And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like – Never just be yourself. There’s something wrong with you.

- @LostFelicia

You Might Also Like

@iwearaonesie

[commercial for kids]

woman *opens pantry and 6 bags of chips fall out* ARGH!

narrator: Are you tired of having food in your house?

@CheryeDavis

I’m perfectly fine with kissing frogs to find a prince…But I draw the line at kissing snakes.

@jwoodham

Why would America make the bald eagle its national bird when all they do is attack things and fly away and nevermind I think I get it now.

@ghostkrogh

me(being given hot dog factory tour): so if i fell in this vat & died it would pretty much taste the same
tour guide: almost certainly keith

@KrangTNelson

ME: [brutally murdered by police for no reason]

MEDIA: Man Involved in Yesterday’s Curfuffle Had Troubling History of Pot Use and Cursing

@BoomBoomBetty

My dad: Too many lamps in a room we are sitting in is wasting electricity

Also my dad: Installs a dozen flood lights to illuminate the outside of the house

@chapel3929

*checks the hip hop section*

Nope. No one named Velocirapper yet.

@MsFoxIfUrNasty

*pinching bridge of my nose*

Kid, the sky is blue because it’s made of dead Smurfs, okay? Believe me, I don’t like it either.

@4handfuls

Her: What are your passions?

Him: Meditating and gourmet food & drinks.

Narrator: Which was code for sleeping, Cheez-its?, and Capri Suns.