[my 1st day as spelling bee host]
your word is policy
“can you use it in a sentence”
um i think hes an undercover cop, he looks a bit policy
[approaches outdoor cafe holding balloon w/face drawn on it]
Hello table for two ple- [large gust carries balloon away] OH NO MY WIFE
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My favorite part of the Bible is when God gives humans free will, then kills them with a flood because they didn’t act the way he wanted.
*person walks past me minding his business and not bothering me in any way*
“What’s this idiot doing?”
Is there a term yet for the now-rampant stores with
-$300 sack dresses
-ceramics with boobs on them
-palo santo sticks
-geometric gold earrings
-at least 3 items w/questionable arrow/feather/tipi imagery
I’m ready to make a bingo card
shall I compare thee to a summer’s day/
its very rude to not respond/
good luck finding anyone on here with that attitude/
Wow…trying to wrap my mouth around this bratwurst reminds me of my first high school boyfriend.
He hated bratwurst.
My husband and I have been in an open marriage for five years. I hope he’s ok with it when he finds out.
HER: knock it off!
CAT: lol ok
My gastroenterologist used to be a plumber.
Having to see him is gut-wrenching
One more glass of wine and my “only a lesbian from the waist up” rule is about to go out the window.