wrestling movies: im sad and i have something to prove to my dad
actual wrestlers: my name is Nutbuster Mike and i dont care if i die
You Might Also Like
…u ok Nintendo?
MAJOR TOM: Tell my wife I love her very much…
GROUND CONTROL: She knows.
MAJOR TOM: Wait… Is she with you now?
GROUND CONTROL: Bye, Tom.
I’ve been called a “female comic” so many times, I’ll probably only be able to answer to “girl daddy” when I have children.
Pho tastes great for a food that sounds like it just gave up.
The most romantic movie of all time is definitely Pixar’s UP. That old man really loved his house.
random kid: you are going to hell because Jesus doesn’t like tattoos
me: do you have any tattoos?
me: so you won’t be in hell?
me: *thinks for a moment* okay. I’m good then
Be like a cat and never give up on closed doors.
The only vampire who matters to me lives on Sesame Street. The rest don’t count.