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@FeelingEuphoric: [at the altar]
*leans in for a kiss*
Priest: the bride, sir
@tarashoe: love how during intense moments in space-themed movies they'll show the dashboard panels, as though you'll be like ah. ah i see the issue
@That_Damn_Duck: If you feel like your parents didn't hug you enough as a child then it's probably because they didn't really want you.
@ShipInTheKnight: I just don't understand how moats ever went out of style.
@blade_funner: [sees that Abraham Lincoln is trending]
Please be alive, please be alive, please be alive, please be alive
@SortaBad: *slips the attendant $20* "make sure you pick me out a good one"
Sir this is a daycare...
"uh huh *winks* a daycare"