@SpankMeIm0ty: At the rate I'm throwing shit out as I pack to move there's a strong possibility not all the kids will make it to the new house
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@huntigula: My 8yo niece: I have 6 boyfriends ME: ok wow, that's a- Niece [interrupts]: I hate all of them
@hoplesslycrazy: I talk a lot of shit for someone who won't sleep with her feet out from under the covers because of the monsters under the bed.
@jordan_stratton: COWORKER: Wanna come to my NYE party?! ME: Aww... I would, but I already have plans. MORGAN FREEMAN: He did not have plans.