Home Alone (1990)
A know-it-all, suburban elitist cruelly humiliates two economically anxious men, seeking to improve their lives
Axl Rose: You know where you are? You’re in the jungle, baby
Tarzan: yeah but why are you here.
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“Shut the door, drop your pants, and get on top of me.” -My toilet
in australia we call her kilometrey cyrus
“To label you “divine” would be to capture but a fraction of your resplendence.
… and could you pleeeeease grab an Oreo while you’re up?”
I always feel a little guilty when a bum catches me eating food out of the garbage because I want to, not because I need to.
Me: The enemy launched a missile, sir
Sargeant: What’s the point of impact?
Me: Because otherwise there’s no boom, sir
[burglar gently waking me] you live like this?
if I ever go missing, it won’t be hiking. you guys don’t even have to look there.
“and this blood shall be called A+”
all the other blood types: “k wow we’re like right here”
Damn girl are you Schrodinger’s cat cos you’re in a box and all these nerds are talking about you?
Sir have some respect this is a funeral.