@AndyRichter: Back in my day when we found a Pokémon we had to beat it to death with a rotary phone
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@MomOnFire: So I said, “Why don’t you eat one of these fried cornbread balls,” and he said “hush puppie,” so I said, “You hush, you piece of shit,” and one thing led to another court date.
@KarateDonuts: Me: *pouring beer on the ground* CW: For your homies? Me: What? No. This is Coors Light. Nobody should drink this shit.