@RunOldMan

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, desserts are the second most important.

You Might Also Like

@stevemarriott

I lost my camouflage wallet, so if you happen to see it, then it’s shitty camouflage and I don’t want it back

@pinningnut

My husband and I are thinking about leaving everything to our dog. What he will do with $20.00 I don’t know. But I hope he enjoys it.

@FancyNancyAnn

I’m at my most gymnastic when I’m trying not to touch the toilet seat, sink and door handle in a public restroom.

@Cheeseboy22

Startle and amuse your cat by replacing its kitty litter with Poprocks. (Ladies: feel free to share this idea on your pinny website thing.)

@christine_p_33

Today is 3 wks in quarantine w/o sugar. Walking 3 miles a day, no meat, dairy or flour! I feel great! No alcohol & vegan diet! A 2 hr home workout everyday. Lost 14 lbs & gained muscle mass! I have no idea whose tweet this is but I’m proud of them so I decided to copy & paste it!

@TheBoydP

Not to brag but I can keep up with the fast part of the chicken dance…

@lildandeli0n

[Gets Twitter error: “Somehow, somewhere, something went wrong”]

I know Twitter, I know.

That’s why I’m here.