My husband and I had an argument yesterday, we went to bed angry.
I woke up to a bacon egg & cheese. I thought wow… he’s really making an effort. I ate it.
Turns out it wasn’t for me 🤣
BRUTUS: hail Caesar *draws knife*
CEASAR: not this time *hands Brutus an Uno “reverse” card*
ROMAN SENATE:*stabs Brutus to death*
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me: not from what i’ve seen.
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Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Me: [stops painting nails] Nope. What’s up?
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HIM: I’m sorry about last night.
ME: *takes a bite of an apple*
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