@papasuncle

Can’t blame Waldo for hiding. Imagine if some dude just starting writing books encouraging people to find you.

Can’t blame Waldo for hiding. Imagine if some dude just starting writing books encouraging people to find you.

- @papasuncle

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@punished_picnic

2018 guy: girls wear so much makeup lol
1018 guy: I can’t even tell who i’m married to because everyone’s face is covered in dirt

@1Badasspoolboy

How do you tell someone you’re the one I want without sounding too much like John Travoltra in Grease.

@Brampersandon_

[stand-up comic bombing]
Comic: I guess I can tell you my joke about ghosts
Audience: BOOOOOO!
Comic: Oh ok you’ve heard that one before.

@mattZillaaaa

Everyone on Instagram has pics of them at places all over the world & I’m like here’s another shot of me from a different angle on my sofa

@Rick_IZ

People who lick their fingers then page through the papers on the printer

Just throw it out. I’ll print it again.

@molly7anne

Picture this. You’re blind folded. Sandra Bullock tells you not to look. You look. You’re surrounded by garbage and dirty socks. But how can this be? It smells amazing? This is a febreeze commercial.

@jonnysun

its all fun and games until someone loses an I?. then we cant play scrabble anymor

@KyleMcDowell86

*puts dreamcatcher above bed*

“Sure hope this works”

*wakes up in the middle of the night*

*Ryan Gosling is stuck in dreamcatcher*

“YES”

@jctwritesstuff

Me: *gazes into his eyes*
Him: *sweats*
M *winks*
H: I’m kinda uncomfortable
M: But this is love
H: It’s my job to fill liquor orders, ma’am