@TheBoydP: Can’t, I’m in big trouble with the wife. I didn’t notice a new piece of furniture for two months.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KelseyCook: Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can tweet angrily from the toilet for your country.
@rolldiggity: Dog Walking Business Idea: 1. Train every dog to walk another dog. 2. Put the dogs in a dog walking circle. 3. GO TO A MOVIE!
@MoneypennyNaked: Living check to check is fine til you go from "Think I'll treat myself to a $7 latte" to "Which kid do I sell to pay for these car repairs."
@phaggots: [texting my girlfriend] wyd? "Just finished my homework" Cool, Send a pic (; ? *gf sends a nude* Ewww wtf!! i meant of your homework!