@deloisivete

Captcha: pick all the squares with worms

Me: *sigh* why is it always click bait

You Might Also Like

@dance_blessed

I got this “breathe” tattoo because I don’t have a central nervous system and it’s a helpful reminder.

@ThaJawn

Hipster: Check out my mini..
Me: *snatches and eats
Hipster:.. Bonsai tree
Me: *swallows* It’s alright for a veggie
Hipster:
Me: anymore?

@robwhisman

just saw the gorilla thing. what kind of thoughtless, negligent parent would raise their child in ohio

@lovemydogduck

Some of my co-workers want to go hang out tonight. Trying to figure how to fake my death and still make it into work tomorrow.

@heyitsJudeD

Bank robber: everyone get down now!

me *starts dancing frantically*

@AndyAsAdjective

Promised myself that today I wouldn’t steal anything, kill anyone or use any Meatloaf song lyrics in a sentence & two out of three ain’t bad

@heyitsJudeD

Hubby just choked after he bit into a grape and it squirted down his throat….

Not as easy as it looks is it?

@TheAlexNevil

I’ll never forget what my dad said when I gave him a picture I drew and asked him to put on the refrigerator:
“You’re 22.”

@TheTweetOfGod

Traditional marriage was between a boy’s parents and a girl’s parents. And maybe some cattle.

@Adar79Angie

Since Walking Dead isn’t on I’ve hid pot from my stoner friends. As they amble around looking for it I’m shooting them with paint ball guns.