@IvoryGazelle

CAVEMAN: I got a Masters in History

CAVEMAN 2: Nice! How long did that take?

CAVEMAN: Nearly half an hour

You Might Also Like

@miffedmim

As an introvert, having a special place in hell reserved just for me sounds rather nice.

@LosLos__

Why is everyone smiling at me today?

*checks fly*

*no pants*

Aaaah.

@iGreenMonk

Conversation between Adam and Eve must have been difficult at times because they had nobody to talk about.

@surasshu

O M G. i had to screenshot this before CNN deletes their tweet 😂😂😂

@AnOrangeSNES

When life gives you lemons, worship the elder Gods. Take candy from a baby. Drink from a trough of blood. Who cares? None of this matters

@ManvAlcohol

What happens in Vegas stays on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Vine, and medical records.

@Fred_Delicious

wait did that Australian guy say “meteorite” or “mate are ya alright?”
*gets hit by a meteorite*
“hey mate are ya alri… no you’re dead*