@moose_chocolate: "Clique" is a French word meaning "small group of insufferable douchebags".
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@HeSlimedMeRay: My son just complained about how far the guy in his video game has to walk. We take our lazy seriously around here.
@knew_nic: A friend’s 90 yo grandma just won an award for doing the most Jell-O shots in her retirement community. As if I needed more evidence that I’m not living my best life.
@ReeseButCallMeV: OMG I forgot to read my horoscope and now I have no idea what life has in store for me today!!!!!!