Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Follow us on Instagram. In case you are wondering "But Why!". We post nice "night mode" funny tweets that are easy on your eyes when you are lying down on your side and night and scrolling through your phone while trying to get numbed up and forget the day. Click here to follow us

@markleggett: Close your eyes. Now imagine a peaceful meadow. That meadow represents your betrayal. I told you to close your eyes, but you kept reading.

Close your eyes. Now imagine a peaceful meadow. That meadow represents your betrayal. I told you to close your eyes, but you kept reading.
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@BuckyIsotope: CRAIGSLIST AD: Wanted - chicken nugget shaped like Rafael. Have 2 Leonardo's, willing to trade. Serious offers only. No Michaelangelo's.

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@simoncholland: I just want to be rich enough that I don't have to watch DIY videos on YouTube every time something in my house breaks.

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@livlivme_do: The lord giveth, and the lord slappeth that shit right out of your hands.

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@ScottyBondo: Just walked into my local court house, they were all sitting around in a circle with black candles and robes trying to summon a jury #funny

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